I just wanted to say a BIG thank you to Doug for writing a truly AMAZING book and laying it all out there for the public.
A second thank you to Doug and Umpa for answering every single question, assuring me and reassuring me, supporting me, being honest with me, and overall helping me.
And a thank you to everyone on this forum who has supported me and tried to help me along the way.
I have come to some HUGE realizations and I want to share them with you as I say goodbye – at least for now.
So, here goes… Not only am I deeply and truly addicted to sugar (carbs) but I have an eating disorder, a binge eating disorder to be exact. So, now matter what I do, this plan, that plan or even the FTS lifestyle – nothing is going to work for me until I fix this fundamental problem.
I binge eat out of hunger or from restricting and for me, counting carbs is restricting and I am spending too much time counting carbs, tracking my calories (even though Doug does NOT suggest or support this, it is my own disordered mind that propels me to do this) and weighing myself (morning and evening repeatedly). When I don’t see results on the scale I get extremely frustrated which leads me to want to eat or give up. I am also spending too much time on this forum instead of getting on with things I need to do. I think that by spending all this time focusing on my weight it is a mechanism to avoid my life and the things I really should be doing.
I have been reading the book The Truth About Beauty by Kat James in conjunction with Fat to Skinny. This author suffered a terrible eating disorder and healed herself by eliminating sugar just like Doug suggests. Obviously there is more to just cutting out sugar for me so for now I am going to focus on healing myself. I am now implementing some natural supplements to help with anxiety, and cravings which I am hoping will help.
Additionally I would like to put it out there that with a little research I realized that Sucralose causes a reaction in me that aggravates my insulin makes me hungry and brings back my cravings so I am never going to put that in my body again and am sticking with Stevia, Xylitol and Malitol. Just wanted to share in case anyone else has noticed Sucralose doesn’t work for them.
I am also throwing out my scale today. Yep, you heard me… in the garbage it is going once and for all. I am going to go by how my clothes fit and how I feel.
I am also going to stick with the principles of FTS but without counting my carbs as for me personally it keeps me in my disordered frame of mind which is counterproductive. I am going to focus on my HEALTH, my children and my husband and living my life instead of obsessing about weight.
I wanted to share this with you because A) your support has been incredible. I can’t even get this kind of support from my own friends so you don’t know how much it means to me and B) I don’t want any of my previous posts to discourage anyone because now I see that this lifestyle can’t work for me until I fix my eating disorder and C) maybe someone out there is going through what I am going through and I would like to help
So I am saying goodbye for now. Once I can correct my imbalances and eradicate my diet mentality then I am sure I can come back to FTS as a real lifestyle.
Thank you again to all of you and best of luck with your FTS journey!
Sincerely, Nic
