Im in trouble-stuffing my feelings with food again

[izzet]

I won't go into a long account of details but for the last week or so I have been eating my feelings until last night I asked what' at my stores....I feel so overwhelmed.  It seems feelings I have about my new job and the stressors that come with being a supervisor of people that don't have the same care or work ethic as I do....but they are as busy as I and I feel I can't be upset with them so I turned it inward and tried to stuff it down down down.  It finally came up this morning and I feel so vunerable. 

I am trying to just let it all out instead of pushing it down but I still need to function.   I feel like I just want to lay in bed and just cry and hide from the world.  This job is not my bliss and I didn't feel right when I accepted it but my husband wanted me to take it to help out our financial situation.  I don't blame him or have any ill feelings about him.  I'm just miserable.  I need to create but I don't know what I want to do instead.  I know I should be grateful for my job when so many others are without so that also causes guilt for feeling the way I do.  I want to stop this eating before it sabotages my success but I don't know what to do instead of eating right now because I'm not feeling strong.

Thank you for listening

[joagain]

Hi  izzet  I was thinking about you the other day . I thought she must be busy with her new job . I am sorry you are having a hard time with work .
 I know that eating is a very easy way to feel better but as always it is not gonna help or make things better. In the FTS case we will just make our bodies feel bad as well as our minds . Wonder why food gives us such comfort when it really does nothing to help just makes it worse .  Hope you feel better Izzet, we have missed you around here . Hope you feel better soon !

[Doug Varrieur]

OK Iz...here's my advice. Quit sucking it up! Your instincts are demanding that you speak and be heard....by fighting your instincts you are not living up to your management potential, hurting yourself and cheating the company.  Being the boss is a thankless job BUT that's your job! Get back in the game and kick some ass. Iz, over the past several months I've gotten to know you pretty well and I know you're a fair person, don't be concerned about hurting others feelings. Every speak of energy you feel for another person should be directed upon that person and that person only. Get it all out instantly then move on to the next issue. Here's a quote from another one of my books;

Page #7 THE CHERRY TREE;

“Business is business… there‘s no room for emotion”

Emotional decisions in business usually result in mistakes. If you’re emotional about an issue, step away from it before making a decision. Do not make a final decision until your business mind tells you it’s the correct decision.

Check your e mail I sent you a copy

[umpa]

I agree with Doug.Enjoy the book it will help you alot!!!***HUGZ***

[beebs]

beebs hugs for izzet! 

[izzet]

I love beebs hugs!

[mouseissue]

Hi izzet, 

Doug's advise to you is very sound.

As a person who has managed others in a professional environment, I too echo that business is business.
Outside of the desire to be fair with others, feelings have NO place in it.

Most employees appreciate knowing when they are not living up to expectations and want to correct deficiencies.
So do yourself and your direct reporting employees a favor, don't remain silent when your conscience tells you to speak up.
You, they, and your company will all be better for it!

Here's a hug of encouragement from me to you... 

[izzet]

I am hearing it...I am absorbing it....no emotions in business just be constructive in my feedback so they can improve.  I needed to hear that...thanks guys!

[ShihTzuMom1]

Big **hug** for you Izzet.  You should not be shouldering all of the work.  Delegate responsibilities to your underlings.  Let them know what is expected of them.  They probably let you do things, because they know you will do it.  Don't feel bad about acting like a supervisor, you are the supervisor.  You are a strong woman, don't let them get you down.  Go in with a new attitude and all will turn around for you.  Take care.  We are all here for you.

[izzet]

ShihTzuMom1 thanks for that...I needed to hear that too! I am a strong woman and a leader...I can command the forces. lol  This is probably why I am in this position...the man upstairs wants me to learn....to get past my fear of hurting someone's feelings and speaking up and be the supervisor.

[Square1ate]

try eating the necessary fruits of the plan and drink less water to hold down the hunger. NOt whole glasses of water!@

[joagain]

welcome Square1ate  to the first day of your new life !!! Just hold on while you go thru the detox and after that is over you will feel better then you ever have !!!

[mouseissue]

try eating the necessary fruits of the plan and drink less water to hold down the hunger. NOt whole glasses of water!@

Welcome to the family, Square1ate!

I'm not sure what you mean by "eating the necessary fruits of the plan".
Some fruit, most notably berries, are permitted in limited amounts.

And drinking MORE not less water will not only hold down hunger by filling space in our stomachs,
but also flush toxins out of the body that can slow weight loss, as well as a number of other good and necessary things for our bodies.

If our bodies sense even mild dehydration, it will trigger a survival response that will stop fat burning dead in it's tracks.

I urge you to read Doug's Little Yellow book again!

[Elizabeth779]

Hi Izzet -- work stuff is hard...I HATE work politics.  And when i get a feeling....I have to be very careful, because I have learned that "feelings lead to feedings"....we need to find another outlet for our feelings....also....when I'm not "stuffing my face with carbs" I feel everything more...and I experience my emotions more deeply....all the good and negative emotions....it's sort of hard to reign in at times, but doing something physical can help, or playing a musical instrument...and getting on here and saying how i really feel helps....and blogging....i have a blog over at word press....no one reads it....it would probably bore someone to tears, but it is where i can write how i really feel.....i wrote a really negative piece the other day how i truly feel about bitchy office politics.....and when i read it i had to mark it as private, but you know after writing that all down....i felt better...and no one in the world will read that blog (which is probably a good thing)...so write down how you feel, and keep talking to us too....that way you get feedback and support. 

Hang in there gal!  We can DO THIS!

[umpa]

Great advice!