Hi Jacki -- I'm so glad you posted -- Your story sounds like my story.....and all the above responses are absolutely so spot on. In fact I think I'll print them and carry them around to re-read when I struggle (which is often). Like you and the others we have this thing in common of carb addiction. And it's like a cave-in to our life that the only way out is a lot of hard work to dig out from under, and I'll agree with you that is very difficult in light of eating patterns, bad habits, and emotional and very real difficulties in our lives.....I'm with you on the difficulties of a relative with dementia -- I've been caretaking a mother with dementia. While at times I could just fall or dive head first into a bag of M & M's, I always always always desire, long for, yearn for the freedom from carb addiction, and oh heck jacki you know from your success to get to 265 how much better you felt mentally, physically, spiritually on the wagon versus sunk into carb hell.
Morgan wrote the famous "hike up the big girl undies and get with the program" post, but it's always true, whether it's the first time we hike them up to make things better or the 99th time. We just have to keep on working on that effort and never give up.
Years ago I envisioned that my journey to mastering carb addition, good health, and
weight loss would be like I'm in San Diego and need to travel to my destination that is Seattle. Now that trip is being made in say a cranky old car (representing lifes trials and my bad habits), but I will never make it to Seattle without keeping my car pointed north AND traveling....sometimes slow, sometimes faster, but I have to keep the car on the road pointed north. If we had a break down on the road we wouldn't just pull up on the side of the road, give up and set up camp??? and we can't with carb addiction either and if you've noticed, the family around here doesn't require our perfection to assist us.
All above suggestions from FTS family have amazing inspiration and solid helpful suggestions.....for instance, I was sitting here yearning for cookies....instead got up and made cup hot decaf tea with zero sweetener. Let's find a new comfort food like tea....oh and I suggest meditation, relaxation tapes, prayer, etc....and keep posting...whenever I blow it I want to hide, and that's not good either.